Friday, October 26, 2018

Put Yourself In Time Out...


There's just something about koi ponds that makes me feel relaxed and have a sense of peace. Places such as this provide me with a nice little break from stressors and quiet time to calm the storm that is incessantly present in my brain... A Time Out

According to Wikipedia, "Time-out is a form of behavioral modification that involves temporarily separating a person from an environment where unacceptable behavior has occurred." As adults, we get moody (ie, grumpy, snippy, attitudinal...), stressed, overwhelmed, etc. These are behaviors that are generally Un-Acceptable for/to the persons around you, especially the ones closest to you.

So, today, I am going to play the virtual Mother and "sentence" you to a Time Out, Mister/Ma'am...

For children, this means removing them from a pleasurable activity or environment, to give them time to "reflect" on what they have done to cause the consequence. For adults, this means to remove you from the environment/people/area that is causing your negative vibes.


Anyone who has read some of my blog material, and/or follows me on social media, knows how much I love the beach for its peace and tranquility. However, what I've discovered is that I don't need to and shouldn't wait for months at a time to take a long, and sometimes expensive, trip in order to take a time out. There are so many other ways to get that little necessary break. I have a few pointers/ideas for your Time Out sentence:
  1. Determine what brings YOU happiness/joy/peace, as this is different for different people. For me, I need/enjoy:
    1. a quiet place
    2. alone time
    3. nature
    4. beautiful scenery
  2. Block your calendar for the weekend
    1. don't allow anything/anyone to book up your schedule for you (something that I have a difficult time with myself)
    2. unless it's an emergency, don't convince yourself that you Need to do something else besides taking this Time For Yourself (synonymous with Time Out)
  3. Visit a hot spot in town in town (if you truly don't have a whole weekend to spare or you direly just need to "step outside of your world" for a moment)
  4. Take a weekend trip to someplace new
  5. Take a Time Out no less than once a month
 50 coolest neighborhoods in the world

As much as my heart desires to travel the world (and I will), I've had to come to the realization that I need more than the sporadic beach/ocean view. After one of my regular self-evaluation sessions, I have determined that my behavior (self doubt, negative thoughts, etc) is absolutely unacceptable, so I'm going to put myself in Time Out (soon)... And you should too...

Planning for my Time Out and feeling positive, I leave your always passionately driven ChristalNicole...


Tuesday, October 9, 2018

Let Me Talk...

https://youtu.be/S73bIrfb994

Let me talk. Let me speak. Let me say what's on my mind...

So many times, we hold things in for years and it eats away at our very souls, affecting every part of our lives...

I can personally say that I'm aware that my past has not only affected my self image but every relationship that I have attempted to form...

Speak. Let it out... Let go of the negativity that seeks to keep you bound. Be free...

Your passionately driven ChristalNicole...

Thursday, October 4, 2018

The Power of Communication...


I am in no way a sketch artist. However, I had this vision of communication being the roots of a relationship, sprouting branches of longevity, commitment, loyalty, love, trust, etc.....

So let's discuss this "thing" called communication. It is an idea, a concept, a living entity, necessary/mandatory for any type of relationship to begin, be sustained and/or end. It is birthed and either nurtured or abandoned, causing it to become either positive or negative.


There are three types of communication:

  1. Verbal (Talk to/with me. Tell me what's on your mind. Don't just talk "at" me)
  2. Nonverbal (I see how you look at me or fold your arms in a negative manner or how you hold/kiss me to express your love...)
  3. Written (Text. Write a note, etc)
I am so literal, and I love the definition that I found for the meaning of communication. The verbiage "exchanging of" and "means of connection" are almost poetic to my brain. Communication is the key to reviving a broken friendship/marriage or the stake driven into the heart of an already dying relationship.


Understanding the importance of communication is the first step. Understanding "how" to communicate is the next step...

But how? I know you're asking (and I've been trying to help you out with that already, but here's a little more...)
  1. Be transparent/honest
  2. Be willing to share yourself, your experiences, as you expect the other person to do
  3. Don't talk AT a person. Talking at a person means that you are not allowing that person to speak, and what have we learned today? Communication is an "exchange". It is "sharing".
  4. While communicating, listen and pay attention, so that you can learn the other person. This will help you to learn a person's temperament, what that person likes/dislikes, etc....
Okay, I have given you some pretty deep and precious golden communication nuggets. If you still need more, then you may just need to come see me for a life skills session. I'm easy to find...

Until we meet or the next time I share, I leave you your always passionately driven ChristalNicole...