Seeking love or companionship, when you haven't learned to love yourself, conquered your own insecurities and embraced your flaws is a dangerous position to put yourself in....
I have this conversation with both women and men quite frequently, actually. The conversation of understanding your decision-making and the power of emotions, self-concept and self-image.
If you've ever read any of my other entries, then you know that I'm all about being transparent and honest with yourself. So, let's be honest. Are you someone who feels that you can't be single? Do you feel like you HAVE to have a man or woman in your life, in order to be happy? Have you made decisions to be with someone, because of those thoughts?.... How did that work out?...
The first step is to love you, who you are and the skin that you are in. I'm sure you've heard people say "How can you expect someone to love you, if you don't love yourself?" While this is true, it is deeper than just saying that you love yourself. You have to take it a step further and actually be "in love" with yourself. Be able to encourage and uplift yourself, regardless of relationship status:
- I love who I am
- I make myself happy
- I am beautiful/handsome to me
- I believe in myself
- I am a good person
- I have a great personality....
From experience, I know the consequences of making decisions that were fueled by my own insecurities (ie, low self-esteem, low self-image, low confidence). Not until surviving a violent domestic relationship and being released from one emotionally damaging relationship after another was I able to recognize the impact of my own necessity for strength....
While I still continue to evolve and grow in strength, I am more self-aware, recognize not making decisions out of loneliness or desperation, and I share with others, so that they too can be strengthened...
As always, I hope and pray that this entry has been encouraging, motivational, and a source of strength. Forever I persevere, your passionately driven ChristalNicole.
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